2 min read

Obsessing over self-improvement often does more harm than good

Something I’ve noticed throughout my “self-improvement” journey is just how easy it is to fall into a trap of obsession around what you “should be doing” to improve yourself and the life you lead.
"I have stories about myself, things I can and cannot do. That is called identity"

— Nathaniel Drew


Something I’ve noticed throughout my “self-improvement” journey is just how easy it is to fall into a trap of obsession around what you “should be doing” to improve yourself and the life you lead.
Listening to advice like “Wake up at 5am every morning, only eat meat—don’t eat meat, take cold showers, don’t drink coffee”. It can go even further when it comes to meeting new people and making new friends. “Don’t text first, leave them on read” and the list goes on. It can get overwhelming and ultimately leads to a more stressful life to some level.

Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s great to want to strive to improve yourself, and doing research around what works for others is a great place to start, but it can quickly change from “this is great advice” to “I need to do exactly what they say”. It’s unhealthy, and ultimately does more harm than good.

What has worked for me is making small, incremental changes that I’ve built upon through daily habits. I’ve found it gives yourself time to experiment; if you notice something impacting your life in a way that doesn’t bring you joy after trying it for a bit, drop it. Try something else. Taking this approach has been way more effective than just trying to overhaul my whole life in one go.

As has been said many times before me, life isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon. Take your time. As long as you try your best I have no doubt the rest will fall into place. And sometimes trying your best is just getting through the day, and that’s okay as well. Life is hard enough as it is without putting pressure on yourself.

Also, I’m incredibly aware of how hypocritical this whole post is….byee.

If you feel stuck or just want to chat, reach out to me on Twitter or Instagram (@heyfuturejesse). I’m always happy to chat.

— Jesse